Jun 27 2006
The Agro Hummingbird
Unfortunately, we don’t have a lot of wildlife on our San Fernando Valley estate. There is a morbidly obese squirrel we have dubbed, “Fatso,” a flock of pesky black birds who only make noise on the weekends at 6 A.M., and the random dove whose pleasant cooing (reminding me of my Grandmother’s porch back home) never betrays his or her actual location in the grouping of large trees in front of our patio.
You can imagine my surprise, then, when one day, as I was sitting on said patio perpetrating a screenwriter, a hummingbird darted out of the tree above me. I saw him only for a second — helicopter-blade streaks of blue buzzing off the side of a tiny, slate-gray body. He was gone as quickly as he had arrived, but I decided then, in a lonely moment of mid-morning unproductivity, that these visits should be encourage more often. So I bought a feeder.
One part sugar to two parts water. Boil the syrup to keep it from fermenting, then hang the feeder in the vicinity of nectar-bearing flowers. Well, I have no nectar-bearing flowers on the grounds, so I had to take it on good faith that my azul-winged friend would eventually discover my offer for cocktails and spread the word to his other long-beaked buddies. Which he did in very short order.
A few days after extending my drink offer, I saw the hummingbird streak through the tree and over our balcony where the feeder was positioned. (I chose the balcony position as to not raise the ire of prickly HOA tyrants.) I ran upstairs to watch the little guy imbibe, but when I arrived, he was already gone. I went outside to check that the feeder was functioning properly, and as soon as I did, the hummingbird launched from the tree, rocketed toward my face, and stopped on a dime, hovering mere inches from my nose. I didn’t move a muscle as we stared at each other. I figured if dogs sniff butts to get to know each other, perhaps hummingbirds sniff noses. After several seconds, the bird flitted over to the feeder where my hand still rested, then shifted right back in front of my face. Point taken. “Don’t mess with my nectar, pal.” I slowly removed my hand from the feeder, and as soon as I did, the little bird with a big chip on his wing shot off into the late-afternoon sky.
I see him once or twice a day now when he stops in for morning coffee or afternoon tea. His is a welcomed presence in our little patch of green surrounded by a massive cement Valley grid. I do fear for the day when I must refill the feeder, though. Remember that Hitchcock movie? I wonder if hummingbird beaks are sharp….
I wish i could take a completely random moment in my life and put it to words like that. I think i’ll try.
I went to a fight today in little mexico(turway apts) and this wack crazy chick started going off all in my grill. I was like yo witch, back up. you must not know who u messin wit. she was all like “i’ll do what i want, who do u think you are.” unfortunately, for her, she was so angry she did not see the badge and the gun i was wearing. needless to say i won the argument and her freedoms will be limited for the better part of 24. hours. wow, i’m spent.
You need to start your own Flo-Town PD Blog. Hard livin’ on the streets of Northern Kentucky. I’ll give you a link if you do.
I admit I am also fond of hummingbirds — hence all the fuchsias in my former So Cal garden. Hang a potted fichsia, Brad, they love shade and hummingbirds love them. Here we have red-tailed hawks which scoop up all the little chipmunks and well, you know….
I personally think this beautiful fast flying fluttering butterfly, has an interest in you. I have never heard of one hovering in someone’s face stairing into their eyes. My grandfather ( Gramps) always told me that if I could catch one with my hands, next to the HollyHock flower, he would give me $50.00. I tried knocked down the Holly Hock flower, got stung by a bee and was in timeout (trouble) with my Grandmother for along time. Catch that elusive Hummingbird my SON, recieve $50.00 for my grandchilds future.
Thanks for the Gramps story, Pops! Maybe I’ll try to catch one for the college fund!